I had a check up with my Oncologist last Monday Oct. 11th and before I left we set up my next PET scan for December 17th at Hillcrest Hospital. The last PET scan in June had low result numbers which my doctor attributed to inflammation from radiation. It had only been five months from the time of my last radiation treatment until that PET scan. (No numbers is the goal). I wasn't happy about seeing numbers but tried to rest in the fact that the doctor thought it was from radiation still.
I have been experiencing discomfort on my right side for quite some time now. Under my right arm is tender to the point of feeling sore, often. The doctor said as nerves heal they can sometimes cause pain. I have to admit, I have allowed myself to entertain the thought that there might be more cancer, and at those times I fear. It doesn’t even matter what I fear, just the fact that I fear means I’ve gotten my eyes off of God and on my circumstances. Cancer or no cancer, I have to take God at His word. I either believe Him or I don’t. I choose to believe Him.
Father God, you know my innermost thoughts. You know all my doubts and fears. I lay my burden of fear at your feet and entrust my future to your care. You have promised to watch over me now and forever. Psalms 121: 7-8 says “The Lord will protect you and keep you safe from all dangers. The Lord will protect you now and always wherever you go.” (CEV). Help me to rest in You, Lord. To trust in Your power and Your promises.
Jeremiah 29:11 once again speaks to me when it says “I will bless you with a future filled with hope – a future of success, not of suffering.” (CEV) . Father you tell us that all things work together for good for those who love You and are called according to Your purposes. We may not understand why we are going through these trials as we travel them, but I will trust that You are using these times to produce good fruit in my life and the lives of those walking this path with me. I am thankful that I can rest secure in the fact that You are faithful.
I thank You for Your healing and for giving me the peace that passes all human understanding. That peace will guard my heart and mind from the attacks of the one who tries to destroy me. I praise you for blessing me and my family with your overflowing goodness. Amen.